Saturday, February 28, 2015

A bit more vulnerability: All we really need is a deep revelation of God’s LOVE for us.

 The Port of Tamatave, Madagascar 

1 Corinthians 13:13 says “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” 

A friend asked me a while back how she could pray for me. I asked her to pray for God to increase my trust.

This was her response:
When you said to pray for trust, my immediate thought was about how ironic it is to pray trust for the girl who sold her house and was selling everything she owned to move to Africa before the program had even accepted her..…. Don't forget what He's done for you and what He's brought you through.”

The crazy thing is that moving to Africa in a lot of ways was the easy thing for me. My struggle is more in the day to day of wondering what God is really doing. Does he really always want the best for me? God has done so much in my life and yet I continue to struggle with doubt. I doubt his sovereignty in my relationships. I doubt his goodness at times. Some days I doubt his plan and wonder why on earth I am 36 and still single. I am currently serving with Mercy Ships in Madagascar and living out a 17 year in the making dream from God and yet I doubt God’s plans. How can this be? 

I see him doing miracles in hearts and lives all around me. I have experienced his deep healing in my heart and life and yet I struggle to continue to trust him and the people he puts in my life. I want to trust him! I want to believe that he wants the best for his kids. 

I don’t understand his ways, but I realize the most important thing I need is to truly grasp his amazing love for me. If I REALLY knew how much he loved me there is no way I would have trouble trusting him with everything. I would always walk in confidence because of knowing whom I belong to and how much He loves me. I would not shrink back from people or situations He is asking me to pursue because I wouldn’t be able to contain the love he wants to show to me and through me.

My prayer for you and for me is for a deep, deep, deep revelation of God’s amazing, unconditional, relentless love.

Maybe this book I am reading will help too.

A Confident Heart

1 comment:

  1. Just stumbled across your blog through the mercy ship's meet our crew donor pages. Thanks for being honest and sharing from your heart. Thanks for serving those in the poorest parts of our world! Looking forward to finding the book you suggested!